Why Can’t They Understand Me?!

Ever try to brush your teeth with your non-dominant hand?
Nearly impossible, right?

By Lyne Desormeaux, PSYD, PCC

Well, trying to communicate or think in your non-dominant style can be just as challenging, if you don’t know how to do it!

What does that look like? Well, recently a past client contacted me to meet with his son who is considering another career. Another client would like to know why one of his direct reports  can’t seem to understand his role and perform accordingly.https://ardencoaching.com/are-my-direct-reports-actually-coachable-the-importance-of-coachability/

We are not all wired in the same way. My thinking style preference may not fit my job description and/or the career path I have chosen. I might be more strategic and you might be more analytical. What if I don’t realize this is about what part of my brain I prefer to use? I might be continually frustrated.

Many times job alignment or job fit is not quite right. What if my profile leans more on the left side of the brain vs. the right side of the brain, but the job I’m in requires more innovation, strategic thinking and people skills than I prefer?

When a client doesn’t seem to be aligned or happy and is struggling, there is a way to first verify if that client is in the right position and if their thinking style preference aligns with what he or she is doing day in and day out or not. That’s when I recommend the Hermann Brain Dominance Instrument to my clients. It helps identify if a client is cognitively-oriented vs. gut/ instinct-oriented and if they are more left brain or right brain.

The HBDI was developed by Ned Hermann at GE in the 1970’s. It’s as an easy self assessment to take and debrief.

The individuals who prefer the A Quadrant tend to be more analytical, logical, fact based and quantitative. Individuals who prefer the B quadrant tend to be organized, sequential, planned and detailed. On the right side of the brain, individuals who are D quadrant tend to think holistically, be intuitive, and prefer to be integrating and synthesizing. Finally, individuals who have their strongest preference in the C quadrant are more interpersonal, feeling based, kinesthetic as well as emotional.

Knowing how I prefer to communicate gives me insight into how I need to adjust my style when I speak with others who may not share my preference. Also, I can then listen to others in a new way, knowing that they may not be able to “translate” their thoughts into my own preferred style. Problem-solving with my team just got easier!


Would you like to know what your thinking style preference is? If so, contact our Executive Coach Lyne Desormeaux to discuss more about the HBDI and how it can assist you.